Saturday, September 25, 2010

Another Dreamy??

I've only gone on one date post-Dreamy. It was right after our first date, and I went out with a guy who was nice and pretty cute. Unfortunately, it happened to coincide with my first day of work, and I was feeling utterly overwhelmed by the mountain of work I had in front of me before school started. I cut the date short in the nicest possible way. When he got in touch with me a week or so later and asked me out to dinner, I didn't reply. I felt too busy to date someone who already raised a lot of red flags during one date, especially given that I liked Dreamy a lot. After that, no one interesting was popping up in my inbox, and I felt happy just dating Dreamy.

Now a month later, Dreamy has been away all week in his far-off country, doubtless working very hard and with nary a minute to spare. I haven't heard from him since a message he sent a couple hours before he left; he hasn't yet replied to my invitation to make his début at my sister's birthday dinner next week. At this point, after more than a week of no communication, thoughts of Dreamy have all but left my brain. It's hard to remember what he looks like, or why I like him. That's the way it is when you've known someone for a month -- things are very tenuous. If he really wanted me to keep him in mind, he should have dropped me a quick note to tell me he's busy but thinking of me. When Slinky was complaining of men she's dating not replying fast enough to her last week, I told her, "Chill out! They're out of town, like Dreamy, and they're busy. If I don't hear from Dreamy until Friday, I won't mind." Well, Friday is now past, and no sign of him.

I don't MIND, per se -- I'm not worried about it, and I'm sure he'll get in touch as soon as he gets back in a couple days. But when I got a message in my OkCupid inbox the other day, it didn't feel like I had much of a reason not to read it. And then it didn't feel like I had much of a reason not to click on the guy's profile and read that, too, after reading the message and finding that he sounded like an interesting, educated guy. Well, his profile was pretty great, too. In fact, he has a lot in common with Dreamy -- same field, same religion, same interests. But he's a couple years older, a bit more settled in his life, and isn't planning a move to New York (that I know of). Could he be Dreamy II?? The newer, better version?

So at that point, after I had read his message and his profile, it really didn't feel like I had any reason not to write to him. And I did.

I haven't forgotten that Dreamy is wonderful. He's a great kisser, and a great guy. I feel happy when I'm with him. He is unfailingly nice, and usually very good at communication, which leads me to think that he really is crazy busy at the moment. I would love for him to be my boyfriend. But he isn't my boyfriend, nor am I in love with him. And until a time when he is, and I am, I see no harm in continuing to explore the waters and checking out any interesting fish (or frogs) that I come up with.


  1. Kissing lots of frogs -- definitely how you find a prince. :) Wise words from our mother.

  2. Anxiously awaiting update...