Thursday, August 22, 2013

If you see something, say something

A date and I went to see Kiss Me, Kate on the Esplanade last night (a musical that really should have been forgotten a couple of years after it was written well over sixty years ago, but here in Boston it is still being staged for reasons that are unclear). The bandshell gets crowded, so my date and I came up with what we thought was a brilliant plan: Pick a spot for our blanket. Leave it there and go kayaking. Buy a bottle of juice and pour our wine into it so we wouldn't get busted for carrying in alcohol, then return to our blanket.

Unfortunately, we forgot about all the enhanced security in town since the Marathon bombing incident. By the time we got back and were informed that our juice was too suspicious to be allowed in, the blanket and bag were long gone, confiscated by the cops. When the security guards understood what had happened they waved my date through, forgetting temporarily about the juice he was holding, to go find the cops in question.

After tracking down the police and bag, he was asked for ID and subjected to a few questions.

"Who are you here with?"

"Ummmm... do you want her name?"

"No, no. Is she cute?"

"Yeah, she's cute," he replied (or at least that's what he *told* me he said).

"We could bring you out in handcuffs if you think she'd be impressed."

He passed on their kind offer. Lesson learned: If you leave suspicious possessions in a public setting in Boston, you will become friends with the cops and be allowed to enter secure locations with alcohol. I would totally do it again.

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